Protect Your Peace
If you have read my previous blog posts, you know that I tend to be very transparent. A bit too open I've been told. But this is who I am now.I choose me. I used to want people to like me. I'm sure you all can relate to that, right? I wasted so much time with people that I hoped were my friends, but in fact were not. I would laugh at their stupid jokes, go to overpriced brunches, and waste my energy on the "wrong ones". You know who the "wrong ones" are right? Let me tell you. They don't quite know what their purpose is and yet they have so much to say about yours. Spending time with them will always leave you feeling drained. They usually have nothing positive to contribute to any conversation, and they tend to go from one drama to the next without skipping a beat. Those are the "wrong ones" for me.
So how did I break free from the "wrong ones"? Quickly and deliberately. I Roshunda, momma to my fur baby Poppy, and writer of great stories, am not responsible for anyone's happiness. That is not my job. I will not carry that burden nor believe such a lie. My response to the "wrong ones" was to simply be unavailable. It's not even a lie. I have a lot of beautiful things happening in my life and as I focused on that, I became less interested with distractions. By the way, not one of the "wrong ones" that I have moved on from have contacted me and said, "Hey Roshunda, we used to hang out and now we don't..what's up?" Not one. Why? Those people didn't care about me. It is totally OK to walk away from relationships that you have out grown. The older I get, the more I am impressed with peace. I seek it. I want it in my life, in my home and in my relationships. I have no time or interest to force relationships with anyone. I am out here starting a business, writing a script for my own show, and planning international trips. I ain't (yeah I said ain't) got time for no foolishness over here honey!! I am walking, breathing, living, and dancing in my purpose.
Like I said earlier, the older I get, the more I appreciate my space and protecting my peace. Shall I explain? My best friend in Houston, has a very successful career. She and her husband own a home that is literally on my vision board! We always meet up and go try a new restaurant in Chinatown. We sit for hours and just share. I love her so much and I thank God for her life. Her friendship is a friendship that energizes. She lifts me up and I do the same. We pray together and just want to see each other be who God has called us to be. She is one of the most incredible women I have ever met. After we have had our Chinatown adventures, have gone shopping, and maybe even seen a movie, we always come back to my apartment. We eat pastries and drink coffee and my dog always lays across her lap. She recently got a promotion that has her overseeing teams all over the world. She writes and gives talks and she's my best friend!! Eeeeeeee!
One thing that never fails, when it is time for her to leave, she always says what peace she feels in my home. Every single time. As a matter of fact, it is what everyone says when they come to my home. I have no need to burn sage in my apartment because I have invited the Holy Spirit to dwell in my home. He is leading and guiding me into places I could NEVER have gone on my own. I am a born again Christian. My life verse is Colossians 2:10 (look it up and be blessed!) and yet....there was a time when I would have done anything to be liked. I thank God for deliverance! Yes! I no longer have a fear of not being liked because I know just how loved I am. I am loved, loving, and lovable. I have people in my life who wish me well with no hidden agenda. I love people freely now and when it is returned, it is a beautiful thing. Guard your hearts sisters and brothers. People will be shocked that you are not as miserable as they as are. That's OK because my God is a transforming God. He will take you as you are in this moment and you will never be the same.
For years I was afraid to write. To pursue writing professionally. To even speak that it was a dream. It is amazing how far I've come. Praise God that I am not the same person I was even last year. Praise God that my testimony is a living testimony. Praise God that there is enough grace for ALL of us at the foot of the cross.
So how did I break free from the "wrong ones"? Quickly and deliberately. I Roshunda, momma to my fur baby Poppy, and writer of great stories, am not responsible for anyone's happiness. That is not my job. I will not carry that burden nor believe such a lie. My response to the "wrong ones" was to simply be unavailable. It's not even a lie. I have a lot of beautiful things happening in my life and as I focused on that, I became less interested with distractions. By the way, not one of the "wrong ones" that I have moved on from have contacted me and said, "Hey Roshunda, we used to hang out and now we don't..what's up?" Not one. Why? Those people didn't care about me. It is totally OK to walk away from relationships that you have out grown. The older I get, the more I am impressed with peace. I seek it. I want it in my life, in my home and in my relationships. I have no time or interest to force relationships with anyone. I am out here starting a business, writing a script for my own show, and planning international trips. I ain't (yeah I said ain't) got time for no foolishness over here honey!! I am walking, breathing, living, and dancing in my purpose.
Like I said earlier, the older I get, the more I appreciate my space and protecting my peace. Shall I explain? My best friend in Houston, has a very successful career. She and her husband own a home that is literally on my vision board! We always meet up and go try a new restaurant in Chinatown. We sit for hours and just share. I love her so much and I thank God for her life. Her friendship is a friendship that energizes. She lifts me up and I do the same. We pray together and just want to see each other be who God has called us to be. She is one of the most incredible women I have ever met. After we have had our Chinatown adventures, have gone shopping, and maybe even seen a movie, we always come back to my apartment. We eat pastries and drink coffee and my dog always lays across her lap. She recently got a promotion that has her overseeing teams all over the world. She writes and gives talks and she's my best friend!! Eeeeeeee!
One thing that never fails, when it is time for her to leave, she always says what peace she feels in my home. Every single time. As a matter of fact, it is what everyone says when they come to my home. I have no need to burn sage in my apartment because I have invited the Holy Spirit to dwell in my home. He is leading and guiding me into places I could NEVER have gone on my own. I am a born again Christian. My life verse is Colossians 2:10 (look it up and be blessed!) and yet....there was a time when I would have done anything to be liked. I thank God for deliverance! Yes! I no longer have a fear of not being liked because I know just how loved I am. I am loved, loving, and lovable. I have people in my life who wish me well with no hidden agenda. I love people freely now and when it is returned, it is a beautiful thing. Guard your hearts sisters and brothers. People will be shocked that you are not as miserable as they as are. That's OK because my God is a transforming God. He will take you as you are in this moment and you will never be the same.
For years I was afraid to write. To pursue writing professionally. To even speak that it was a dream. It is amazing how far I've come. Praise God that I am not the same person I was even last year. Praise God that my testimony is a living testimony. Praise God that there is enough grace for ALL of us at the foot of the cross.
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